My Dragon's Lair Sharing is the reason for my being...: Adult Fun At Ropes End

Thursday, October 11, 2007 3:40 PM

In order to really understand this website, you kinda gotta pull your head out!

RopesEnd -- The place to be for what's really going on in the world!

Welcome to RopesEnd Jokes! I am sure that if you look around a little you will find just what you're looking for. We have something for everyone! Hysterical Jokes, screaming Cartoons, great Program Files plus other weird, wild and wonderful stuff, so check it out. If there is something missing and you want to have it added send me a note and I will hunt it down for you. We are updating and adding new items every day, so Bookmark us and check back often!

We've just added tons and tons of new stuff and, we promise, you'll be cracking up in no time!

REDNECK VASECTOMY
After a man and his wife have their 11th child, the husband decides to consult a doctor about a vasectomy. The doctor knows the man is from West Virginia, so he tells of this procedure: "First, you get an empty beer can, then you light a cherry bomb and put it in the beer can. Hold the beer can up to your ear and count to ten."
The man said he needed time to think about this.
The man decided to get a second opinion, but this time he goes to a doctor in Virginia. Knowing the man is from W.V., he tells the man, "First, get an empty beer can, then light a cherry bomb and put it in the beer can. Hold the can up to your ear and count to ten."
The man decides that two doctors can't be wrong so he goes home, finds an empty beer can, lights a cherry bomb, and holds it up to his ear and starts to count to ten.
He gets to 5 and puts the can between his legs so he can finish counting on his fingers ..."...6, 7, 8, 9, 10, BANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

SHAVED PUSSY! EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE ONE...

NEW COMPUTER

Fish Gas

Ah... a communication breakdown...

FOURTEEN WAYS TO HAVE V-DAY FUN

14. Send sympathy cards to everyone you know who claims to be "in love."

13. Set fire to all the greeting card shops you can find.

12. Boycott all cybercard sites.

11. Remind everyone you know who claims to be "in love" that all the Saint Valentines were martyrs.

10. Remind everyone you know who claims to be "in love" that all the Saint Valentines were tortured, abused, persecuted and/or beheaded.

9. Remind everyone you know who claims to be "in love" that the behavior of the Saint Valentines (participating in all that torture and abuse, etc.) indicates sado-masochistic tendencies.

8. If your sappy-eyed friends aren't interested in the history of all the Saint Valentines, drop Al Capone's name.

7. Walk up to couples who are obviously in love, focus on one of them (same sex works best) and exclaim, "I confirmed our reservation at the motel for later tonight" or "I found your underwear under the sofa." Be creative. Use your imagination.

6. Remind everyone you know who claims to be "in love" that Valentine's Day may also have its origins in the Roman festival Lupercalia, a celebration intended to ensure fertility and easy child delivery.

5. Remind everyone you know who claims to be "in love" that "Cupid" rhymes with "Stupid."

4. Play "Love Stinks" over and over on your stereo at full volume. Alternate with tunes like "Love Hurts" and "I Hate Myself for Loving You" if you want some variety.

3. Wear black.

2. Start a petition to have all love songs banned from radio and television.

AND, LAST BUT NOT LEAST, THE NUMBER ONE WAY TO NOT CELEBRATE V-DAY:

1. On Valentine's Day, go bar-hopping. Steal the date of the sappiest-eyed person in the bar and take your prize to a sleazy, cheap motel for a celebratory one-night stand.

Happy Valentine's Day from RopesEnd.com ;-)

Attention:

You have reached the very last page of the Internet.

We hope you have enjoyed your browsing.

Now turn off your computer and go outside and play.

Labels: adult humor, Not Child Safe